[MD] Intellectual activity

[aesuszynski]

Khaled, I am so offended that I demand that you look at this website. 

http://www.godhatesshrimp.com/

Alice
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Khaled Alkotob" <khaledsa at juno.com>
To: <moq_discuss at moqtalk.org>
Sent: Sunday, May 14, 2006 10:49 AM
Subject: Re: [MD] Intellectual activity


> Alice
> 
> It's Sunday morning and i don't mean to be disrespectful to anyone or
> offend anyone.
> the following is a JOKE written and passed around when Dr. Laura was high
> and mighty in the height of her career.
> 
> 
> =========================================================================
> ===================
> Dear Dr. Laura, 
> 
> Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have
> learned a great deal from your show, and I try to share that knowledge
> with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
> lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly
> states it to be an abomination. End of debate. 
> 
> I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific
> laws and how to best follow them. 
> 
> a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
> pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They
> claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them? 
> 
> b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus
> 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
> her? 
> 
> c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
> period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do
> I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense. 
> 
> d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
> female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of
> mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> clarify? Why can't I own Canadians? 
> 
> e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2
> clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
> him myself? 
> 
> f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
> Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I
> don't agree. Can you settle this? 
> 
> g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
> defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
> vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here? 
> 
> h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
> around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev
> 19:27. How should they die? 
> 
> i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
> unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves? 
> 
> j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different
> crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two
> different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to
> curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the
> trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16)
> Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do
> with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14) 
> 
> I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
> can help. 
> 
> Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
> unchanging. 
> 
> Your devoted disciple and adoring fan. 
> 
> =========================================================================
> ========================
> 
> 
> 
> [Khaled previous]
>> "Had religion yielded and said to that restaurant owner " Hey, as 
>> long as
>> > you are not drinking that stuff, you are OK to sell it to whoever
> wants
>> > it ( within the law) yet still do you 5 daily prayers, your  fasting
> and
>> > your pilgrimage and you are OK."
> 
> [Alice]
>> So is compromise the only way to avoid disintegration? I come from a 
> . Catholic background and the Catholics are famous for their 
>> "cafeteria" 
>> beliefs. Every Sunday they say that they believe in the divine 
>> authority of 
>> the pope and yet feel perfectly OK with using birth control. Of 
>> course these 
>> are American Catholics.
> 
> [Khaled Previous]
>> "Dynamic values is the key word"
> 
> [Alice]
>> And we would be hypocrites if we said we never bend our beliefs 
>> (values) to 
>> fit the situation. But what good then are beliefs in the first  place?
> 
> 
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