[MD] is-ness

[Joseph Maurer]

Hi SA,

I want to play around with the words ³Culture hands us a set of glassesŠ..²
Can a ³set of glasses² help me see anything undefined? Nope!  They can help
me learn some new words? *,_,#,@,.  Why is my eyesight so poor I need
glasses? At first I don¹t have a thing to say about my glasses, but I can
exercise my eyes and maybe have good enough vision.  Now that I am old
exercise is not a consideration.  I might forget to put my glasses on and
not see as well, but how beautiful everything is.  Mechanical/ConsciousŠŠ.

Joe 



On 8/20/08 10:53 AM, "Heather Perella" <spiritualadirondack at yahoo.com>
wrote:

> Perhaps your correct on this Ron.  I've heard much suffering leads to
> enlightenment, that feeling on the hot stove of wanting to live something
> better.  When I was around 15 I contemplated suicide, once when I was as young
> as 12 or so.  I was so sad and thought the world would be better without me
> screwing things up when I was around 11 or 12, I had the knife in my hand and
> was softly rubbing it up and down on my arm, contemplating.  My mother walked
> and asked what I was doing and took the knife and left.  I was so young I'm
> surprised I could even think like that.  When I was 15 I would get so
> depressed.  I was an outcast I always felt.  I moved around 6 times and went
> to 9 different schools by 12th grade.  Got to the point that I didn't know how
> to be friends with people too long.  I had some very good friends along the
> way, but by high school only a couple and never saw them very much.  Not until
> college did I find a social life that even lead to not
>  just hanging out and doing all kinds of fun stuff, but even talking
> philosophically with many people on a deeper level.  When I was 15, it was
> writing that saved me.  I wrote a lot about sadness, and then while I reading
> over some of my old writings in my journals it hit me how sad these writings
> were and from that day on I endeavored to be happy and try to write something
> happy and eventually a good friend introduced me to the woods, hunting,
> fishing, and reintroduced backpacking.  I came upon this friend after one day
> my brother and sister came back from the woods and they were talking to me
> about the woods and how cool it was and what they found.  It brought back
> memories of exploring in the woods before I was a teenager, and I thought
> maybe I lost something back then in those younger years, for exploring in the
> woods was so fun.  I went out in the woods and found all kinds of stuff.  It
> was great!  Then soon after that my brother introduced me to
>  this good friend in which we and my brother and sometimes others would go out
> walking in the woods all day, backpacking, camping, fishing or hunting and
> such.  Once we began talking about the Amerindians the woods became something
> much deeper and I was introduced to a woods-intellect that to this day
> mesmerizing me like sittin' at a fire starin'.  With zazen I was further
> introduced to realizing this intellect ever-present in the living, in the
> wind, in the birds, in a flake of gray ash.  So... it would seem suicidal
> sadness and eventually a deep complaint about this culture and its non-woods
> discernment was realized to be a square peg in a round hole type of difference
> and this culture became a hot stove.  Writing is still what saves me, helps me
> clarify, have fun with words, and think my way through in order to come up
> with something beautiful that satisfies and makes one this effort.  Writing is
> a way to help me harmonize with this world.  Writing
>  helps me harmonize with this culture, so, this culture doesn't seem so bad,
> for the writing is something of this culture I've been able to find a niche
> and put my heart into - a passion in this culture, thus, I see my place more
> and more in this culture.
> 
> 
> SA 
> 
> 
> --- On Wed, 8/20/08, Ron Kulp <RKulp at ebwalshinc.com> wrote:
> 
>> From: Ron Kulp <RKulp at ebwalshinc.com>
>> Subject: Re: [MD] is-ness
>> To: moq_discuss at moqtalk.org
>> Date: Wednesday, August 20, 2008, 2:24 AM
>> Ron,
>> 
>>     Maybe if Ham had some more poetry in his life, he could
>> make his
>> endeavor sound as beautiful as you did here.  But he avoids
>> this "making
>> sense" stuff to what he subjects as mere poetry which
>> is a lower form of
>> intellectual species.  The heart could add some color as
>> you did below
>> and actually make his effort not only more understandable
>> but more
>> alive.
>> 
>> 
>> SA,
>> Perhaps Ham has been fortunate enough to lead a relatively
>> high quality
>> life. He does not see experience as anything special, I
>> think the
>> experience of living is mystical. I had a long time to
>> contemplate
>> nothing-ness,
>> I used to obsess on thoughts of suicide. When one gets to a
>> point where
>> all
>> is meaningless and pain and thoughts of the extinguishment
>> of self is
>> contemplated you address a central value and realize you
>> have a choice,
>> to be or not to be. Once you make that choice it becomes a
>> whole nother
>> ball game.
>> 
>> At least it was for my own experience. That was the day I
>> became a "free
>> agent" . 
>> 
>> 
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