[MD] Crystallising Chaos.

[Heather Perella]

Marsha,

     [Marsha]
     I am trying to apply your ideas to my own
personal psychological experience...  What has come to
my mind is the experience of boredom (stasis).  I have
stated throughout my life is that 'boredom is my
greatest enemy'.   Why?  Because during periods of
intense boredom I am most likely to create chaos, and
chaos can be dangerous.  Of course chaos can also open
one up to DQ and inspire growth.

     Boredom is a static experience that lasts for
some time, a time longer than not being bored.  This
too is my downfall.  I would say another outcome of
being bored is a feeling of being unsettled.  Yet, the
odd aspect of this experience of being bored and
unsettled is not changing what one is doing, thus, I
feel bored still and unsettled but will not do
anything about it.  Yet, if I feel unsettled and try
to do too much, jumping from one activity to the next,
not feeling satisfied with anything I'm doing, then I
am changing and trying to do something different but
it's not working.  My boredom and unsettlement is not
released or rid of.  The only outcome to feeling bored
or unsettled that would be satisfying to me is not
feeling bored or unsettled and hence, a DQ experience.
 Thus, when stuck in an static pattern too long, all
that I want to do is rid that static pattern, even if
that static pattern is full of many activities,
therefore the static pattern may not be 'what I'm
doing' it is the feeling of boredom that is the static
pattern. 

?????????

SA

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