[MD] What of this Rho?

[Heather Perella]

Case, this triggered what's going on in my life, in my
living philosophy.  Thanks.  Comments below:


     [Case]
> "Man is the measurer of all
> things." Rather than a being
> a philosopher Protagoras apparently was a surveyor."
> Who knew?


     Where did you find this info, Case?  By the way,
Thoreau was a surveyor as well.  He also noted
Amerindian life, honored nature, a profound writer, a
pragmatic-philosopher that lived his philosophy, and
as the vision quest goes, he came back to share with
the rest of society by visiting universities and such,
what he experienced.  He also noted that the U.S.
would need to come up with its' own philosophy, one
that incorporated Amerindian life and European life. 
As Pirsig points out the U.S. did just that,
especially as one goes west (speaking in generalities
of course), as Pirsig notes in Lila, as one goes
further east, one goes further European.  Thoreau
talked about Concord/Victorian lifestyle (and the
latest fashions of Paris) where people looked
oversees, instead of right here.  Any present moment
living philosophy will notice the right here, right
now is the life, the way we are living.  To take the
very blood and marrow of this place is to find the
very story of this place.  It is those that notice the
present that notice their philosophy, their way in
life.  This is how static quality changes to keep up
with a living philosophy.  
     This reminds me of where I work.  I am involved
with troubled girls that are stuck.  Some learn, and
seem to process well expectations that the placement
has for them.  Others, can't.  One I have in mind has
been on shadow (the lowest/most troubled youth label
at the facility) for almost a year.  She is not
processing.  It is not that the other girls, that are
moving on in the program, will with 100% certainty
move-on with healthy, social lives, but this girl on
shadowing hides from herself, tries to keep her issues
alone.  We notice she can't move on.  She will do
well, and blow it, seemingly on purpose.  She still
says she doesn't trust anybody, but when further
probed, says she doesn't trust herself.  She probably
has it better at the facility than she would at home. 
Her family doesn't keep in contact with her very much.
 This is being stuck.  She can't readily explain
herself, but probably sees it at times.  It is amazing
how our minds, with constant automatic thinking, will
express the state of our individual self.  Awareness
is always present, but without practicing being with
our awareness one will be with something else.  As Dan
and I where conversing, being attentive, and as I was
trying to state, our wits, are constantly at play
here.  Yet, if one looks away from ones' self, then
the state of self is hidden.  Since we always think,
and awareness never disappear, then who we are does
surface, but what does this self look like?  Is it a
self that hasn't learned anything?  A self that is
stuck in a state that is not so welcoming?  This girl
runs away from her self.  She verbally states how she
knows she is crazy, she thinks she's a monster, and
warns us not to probe too much or else we will see
something not very nice.  
     Ways to practice being with one self is
meditation and walking in the woods, as Dan G.
wonderfully expressed.  I know when this girl first
came, she couldn't stay in her bedroom during quiet
time or had a very hard time doing so.  She said she
couldn't handle her thoughts.  It was too quiet, and
she couldn't stop thinking.  She didn't like what she
thought about.  
     We will be grounded in awareness and be attentive
to what's happening, or if not practicing being with
our self, as this girl has difficulty talking about
her self and doesn't like to bring up anything about
her self in depth, her attention is very strictly on
her surface appearance and what others think about
her, or what she thinks others think about her.  She
is running away from her self, but nobody can truly do
this.  The tension in this SEPARATION is very easily
noticed.  During her living philosophy, this tension
leads to frustration, anger, and constantly trying to
make everything loud, fun, and happy, but never has
she bridged the gap she runs from, and this fun and
happiness is her effort to make things better.  Yet,
all fun and games, while harmful, painful
thoughts/feelings are present, is what we call faking
ones way through.  A mask that screams terror from
within.

thanks.

darkness takes all - night,
SA


 
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